My Vows to Myself

Y'all Show Your Love as 5 and a Possible Present: Courvoisier

Courvousier: Straight from the islands, I am a married lady living in the United States. I strive for knowledge, innovation and perfection in this world; though I’m keenly aware no one is perfect…not even me. I enjoy the simple and exquisite things in life. I believe every life has a purpose and I am eager to fulfill mine.

“And what is the purpose of life? It is the freedom of life, the liberation of life from all things, the liberation which comes when you have gone through all experiences and are, therefore, beyond all experience… welcome to your heart every experience, however unpleasant, however delightful, so as to make your life full as the rain-drop.” – Jiddhu Krishnamurti

Given some recent events that have occurred in my life, I have been pondering many of the life rules that I subconsciously made for myself. Here are few (not listed in any particular order):

You have to own a house.
You have to have a steady paying job.
You have to graduate from college.
You have to have kids.
You have to get married.
You have to look nice.
Etc., Etc., Etc

And being the Type-A personality that I am, I always take those rules a few steps further.

How?
Why?
When?

When I was younger, I recall having really good answers to these questions. Now that I am older, those answers don’t seem so great anymore. I find myself readdressing those rules and trying to justify those answers I thought were so great. And I can’t justify them at all anymore.

For those of you who don’t know me I have achieved all of these "rules" except for having kids. So this is not a case of me giving up on these goals for what ever reason, just because. I guess at this point in my life I feel like I have been there done that. Now what? Still young and in my twenties...what do I do next? So I started making life choices (note: these are no longer rules).

Here they are:

I will no longer make life rules that restrain me from living.

I will focus on the aspects of my life that make me happy/content.

I will believe that life is not work to buy-and-compete; work is to honestly obtain money to finance worthwhile enriching experiences.

And lastly, I will love myself regardless of what I have or have not achieved and/or obtained.

No longer am I going to get caught up in what I think I should be working towards and what I should have at a certain age. And encourage you all to do the same.

These are the vows I'm making to myself.

Much Luv :)

Courvoisier

SBF ISO Dr. Scholl

I enjoyed a great Jill Scott concert a couple of weeks ago. She was rockin a hot pair of golden-colored shoes with a high heel (approx. 3 inches high is my guess). About an hour into her set, Jill changed shoes. As Jill and her back-up singers sang "Pinky toe... pinky toe... pinky toe", a stagehand brought homegirl a pair of flip flops. Jill changed shoes while exhaling in sighs of relief. And the show continued.

Every woman in the house screamed and applauded. We were not only tickled, but pleasantly surprised to see a sister of such fame keep it real while in the presence of the public. I know this is Ms. Real Thing I'm talking about, who always gives it to ya straight, but this was still unexpected. It was a special moment for every woman in the audience...

'Cause each of us wanted to do the exact same thing.

I have read countless articles in newspapers and watched numerous news segments reporting on the negative effects of wearing high heeled shoes. Half the shoes we wear squeeze our toes, scrape our heels, hurt our soles, make us cry on the inside. Yet we continue to torture ourselves.

WHY????

For years, I had one or two pairs of high heeled shoes. I wore them when I went to a party or club hoppin or sometimes if I had a hot date. Or maybe if the ladies and I had reservations at a nice restaurant... basically special occasions. I've always been a sneaker head anyhow. Sneakers prevailed in my closet. Outnumbered girly shoes 4-1, easily. I also have the worst feet to try and shop for. Really. They're flat with no arch, narrow (AA width), with a skinny heel. Try fitting that perfectly into a shoe. Strappy shoes don't fit because there aren't enough holes on the strap to tightly secure the shoe around my foot. Pumps are a damn obstacle 'cause my heel slides out. When I add heel pads, it pushes my toes further into the shoe causing friction and pain. Even flats don't fit well- most of them are too soft to support my arch, allowing my feet to fall inward. This makes flexible rubber soles and shoe laces my best friends.

Shoe shopping with my mom as a teenager was like a Wrestlemania match. We'd walk into the store. I'd tell my mom let me pick what I like and ask her not to make suggestions (because I never agreed with them). After trying the 4th or 5th pair with no luck in sight mom would start coming over with ugly shit in her hand, saying "what about these". I would reply in a not so nice tone, frustrated and pissed. And the match would be on! She would later tell me I need to keep a good job 'cause places like Bakers and Payless would never be an option for me.

So when did I become the chick who wears dresses (sometimes with flowers- yuck!), with a nice pair of heels and a clutch to match? I haven't purchased a pair of Nikes or Pumas or Asics in over six months! My inner rebel is screaming for help. I don't recognize this woman in the mirror anymore. I still rock my Jordan jersey, the Redskins caps, the rare two-toned Air Force Ones that I haven't seen on anyone else's feet... But they haven't been getting the same love as my shiny BCBG heels with the square peep toe. Or the brown distressed boots that tie in the back. And the metallic pumps with the wedged heel.

My feet cannot take it anymore.

I have become one of those women. The ones who read In Style and Vogue magazines. Who spend an entire day or weekend on a shopping trip. And watch What Not to Wear on the TLC channel. Well, not quite, but you get the point... Basically a "girly girl".

I am disgusted.

And in dire need of a foot massage.

Tumultuously Yours,

Dark & Stormy