The Last Angry Black Woman?

Back in the day I worked as a teller. Two years of my life were spent counting out cash and depositing checks sometimes three or four times more than my monthly salary! Needless to say, after while I become dissatisfied with my existence as a bank employee…and the longer I endured the more I noticed the division within the branch. The teller line was made up of five minority women, one from the Philippines, one from Mexico, and the rest were sista girls from the good ole United States of America. But the branch manager and the client services associates who opened the new accounts and certificates of deposit were white…

So when an Asian lady called one of my sista girl co-workers a nigger and drove off because she wouldn’t deposit a 3rd party check for her…the branch management had a difficult time understanding why we were calling Al and trying to hold a march without hearing the customer’s side of the story first. And of course the customer’s story had undergone a few edits when threaten to have her accounts closed… as the customer recalled it she said that my co-worker could have been nicer. Say whaaaaaaaat? Black folks know the difference between nigger and nicer. The woman could barely speak English but she knew how to spew the hate…and she wasn’t on some rapper-drop the “er” nigga tip…it was nigger in all of it’s ignorant glory!

Oh and the moral of the story ya’ll was that after this conversation…the customer’s accounts remained opened. Because really, we all know money talks and bullsh*t walks, and minority folks just have to deal with it when it hits the fan.

Bellini’s post last week got me to thinking about this incident at the bank again and how allegedly we now live in a post-racial society. An era of good feelings-where people see each other as people and by the conduct that comprises their character. Um. But, I still live in America. I know with Obama elected I should be getting over some stuff, but I still think that the prejudices that have patterned the American fabric have become deeper more intricate threads in our societial makeup since the night of November 4th.

Now I don’t know how many of ya’ll have experienced clear and apparent racism, the bank fiasco was the first time that I was aware of it going on so blatantly. But in these days and times I feel like I am the last of the skeptical Black folks left. I Stand on a soapbox in a vacant lot. I feel like I alone still think the man has it out for my fragile community. I guess because I haven’t forgotten Miss Evers’ Boys and I still wonder how crack could devastate generations of families in a decade.

But I wonder if I am just being overly sensitive. In this post racial world, I wonder if I let my angry Black woman unnecessarily ooze out when a white co-worker assumes that my black coworker lives in an apartment when I know she’s a homeowner who drives a Porsche. And the debating continues when an Asian girl at Lee Kim Nail says a college in Richmond, VA has a lot of Black people there. Not that there is a problem with that, but she prefers a school in the country not the city. Hmmm, well if that is your preference, then why not just say that? Why did you have to bring up how many black students attended…if it weren’t a problem? And though I wanted to punch her in her mouth, I wasn’t trying to mess up my $15 manicure. And since she saw me sitting there surely she didn’t mean anything by what she said-I mean no one is that ignorant anymore. Maybe I am just being too emotional, maybe there are a lot of Black people at that school and she was just saying…

Even with Obama-elected and believing in the saving power of Jesus, this girl’s words made me angry. I was offended. And hurt. And I haven’t let it go yet. And in the post-racial world where we all sing Kumbaya, I am confused about what I should do with these feelings of anger I sometimes have as a Black woman living in America and how should I reconcile them with being an American.

See You In Seven

vacuous vocabulary

First my dad, then Rum Punch. Both sent me links to an op/ed piece in the Washington Post – He’s Not Black. So, I read it. Yet prior to reading it, I read I’m Not Post-Racial– another op-ed featured in the Post too. Read them both – and hear me out.

Kudos for Krissah Williams Thompson for being a member of the media and distancing herself from the trend du jour. I know many of my friends and myself included cringe when hearing or reading the words post-racial, a term that seems to have plagued the very existence of Barack’s senatorial and presidential campaign. What does it mean? What are you trying to imply? White folks we understand you want your kumbaya moment, however if we’re to come together it won’t be exclusively on your terms.

Marie Arana, it’s nice that you’re able to identify with President Elect Obama as you see yourself as a mut. However, the immigrant experience is not the same as the black American experience. So, granted you perceive the President-Elect’s presidency a certain way, many do not share your perception. Many immigrants who come to the United States view this nation as the beacon of light on top of the hill, they recite and echo Horatio Alger’s principles. And yet for many citizens of the land – black Americans -- they endured and fought for basic rights, only denied because they were black. And these same black Americans are mixed too – don’t be fooled and think miscegenation didn’t occur over the 400 years during slavery because it did. Now what the mainstream has exercised the fancy of not discussing is that many blacks have white blood runnin’ through their veins – although for the most part not by choice (that’s neither here nor there, it’s history). And in addition to Caucasian ancestry, many blacks have native, indigenous blood runnin’ through them too. And although, many blacks are are aware of this miscegenation in their family tree, this country forbade them from acknowledging who they were. So, now the one thing that sets blacks apart— albeit skin color-- will not nor should be expected to be dismissed or diminished of its inherent value since the President-Elect is being openly acknowledged by the mainstream media as black. Many of us already know several US presidents who had negroid blood runnin’ through their veins (but again, it’s neither or here nor there, it's history).

So, Marie you accurately state, "Progress has outpaced vocabulary."interesting observation. Although, lets not forget progress has a subjective quality. So, yes the President-Elect’s historic presidential candidacy is progress, yet I’m sure you and I can have a lively debate about whether we’ve moved a foot or mile. Many black folks would challenge you on the progress made in American society. Let’s see many of us ain’t feelin’ the criminal justice system, labor statistics, media/Hollywood diversity. The other day when I was in the grocery story at the checkout counter 20 magazines were within my reach only 3 had black women on the cover and if you control for black ownership of magazines than none of the magazines featured a black women on the cover. Progress? Be careful what you say Marie. In the world of high-fashion, there’s a black-out of models. Progress?

Marie, clearly you missed the interview with the Greta van Sustern and the President-Elect as a presidential contender when he reminds Ms. van Sustern that race is still relevant in the United States, because upon departure he was fully aware nary one cabbie would stop for him New York City. Progress? Marie, race is still a salient factor of the American experience. And as that realization torments you rest assured, it torments us too. If you thought Americans could reconcile 4 centuries as a cliff note in the history books due to this historic election – your naivete has got the best of you.

Black folks we’ve got to be a bit more audible and visible when the mainstream tries to hurl these packaged soundbites. White folks we understand your hastiness to run away from the dark passages from American history, but check with us first – so we can keep it real wit’ cha!

cheers,

Bellini