WE ARE: 5 women navigating our twenties in search of peace, happiness and love (or not). WE WRITE: about everything and nothing. From the insane to the mundane- you will find different paths taken, lessons learned and lives lived. WE THINK: you’ll enjoy it...Warning: Consumption of these views may leave you enlightened while intoxicated.


The View From Here will conclude on Friday, October 1, our third year anniversary. We would like to spend this month thanking all of our readers, followers, haters, visitors, family, friends, and fans for your continued support, encouragement, and comments over these past few years. Thanks y'all!
-The Five Spot

Thursday, December 4, 2008

michelle, ma belle

Since November 4th folks (read: Black folks) have been talking bout, "Well, now that Obama is president...[fill in your random request here]." Most of these requests are a little far fetched but I came across one that may actually have some merit. The other day while chatting with one of my co-workers, she hoped that with the O-man in office, Black men would follow in his footsteps and get themselves a Michelle! And being the perceptive Black educated woman that I am, I immediately knew exactly what she meant.

See Barack could have done the Harold Ford and came off less threatening. Or he could have gotten himself a lady who lunches. Someone who looked good on his arm but served no real purpose beyond political eye candy. But it seems, as with all things in his life, he was thinking ahead, like I-wanna-be-president-of-this-motha ahead. Barack is a man of great strategery, if you will. He wrote books about himself and his thoughts on America when no one really knew who the hell he was. He picked a city that he had absolutely no ties to, moved to one of its poorest neighborhoods, joined one of the most influential churches in that area and became a community organizer when he coulda been Chief Lottsadough. This was no accident. He wanted authenticity. He wanted to become a Chicagoan coming from the south, the south, the south side of the Chi!

But he didn't stop there. He chose Michelle. Slave stock from South Cakalak Michelle. South-side born and bred Michelle. There is no denying it. Michelle is all the way Black, with thick shiny Black hair, long elegant limbs, piercing eyes, strong cheekbones and much junk in her trunk. Michelle is strikingly Black. She might not be the most beautiful woman (to some) but I guarantee that when she walks into a room, all eyes on her!

To be sure, Barack loves him some Michelle and the weeMichelles. Cause he loves whatever he commits himself to, whether it be a woman, a job, this country. But the beauty of the thing is that she (and any Black woman of her kind) is the perfect compliment to him (or any ambitious Black man). She upgrades him. She's an equal who will play her part but still let him take the lead role, believe me. Michelle challenges him (see: Barbara Walters) when she thinks that he’s wrong, but hits him with the terrorist fist jab when homeboy is doin' the damn thang. And she’s super smart and can provide him with some strategery of her own during their late night pillow talk. She is a co-mate and co-pilot. Down for the cause, but the cause better be a well-thought-out, exquisitely-executed, I'm-only-doin'-this-on-time-negro cause. Reliable, dependable, sweet and sassy. Ok, I'll stop for I could go on and on because I heart Michelle.

So that’s why Black men need to get them some Michelle in they life. Most striving Black men go for the easy or should I say a fair amount, approaching many but don't want to generalize, ambitious men go for a woman who they are not threatened or intimidated by (read: young and slightly dumb). They want the woman who will sit back and shut the fuck up. Who they can tell what to do and she will say baby I already did it without and independent thought as to whether it should have been done. Who won’t challenge them or make them think outside the box. To each his own I guess but from a productivity prospective, this is not a good look.

It's like when a woman decides to stay home and watch the kids. Aint nothing wrong with that but the family unit then loses 50% of its potential income. Or mayhap everybody doesn't want an equal. Maybe men are scared or threatened by a Michelle. I would not begin to presume to know what men think or want. I'ma just over here being me. But maybe the real life Michelle, as she glows as first lady before our eyes will teach these brothas a thing or two. Cause you know every Black man in America loves them some Barack. Tap on any Black man's iphone and see what wallpaper he has sitting there. Ask a random Black man on the street where he’ll be on January 20th. Exactly!

For wanna-be Michelle's like me, let's hope they are dissecting his choice of a mate as well. And let's hope that they see that for all of Michelle’s strength, for all that she challenges and equals Barack, look at the way she supports him. How ride or die she is. How she pushes him to excellence and always brings her A game to the table. How she may not be light skin with long hair but homegirl is fierce! And maybe they’ll think outside the box as well.

Yes you can, my brotha, yes you can!

Photo by Courtesy Photo


Rum Punch said...

And don't forget Katt Williams said, it looks like if you walked up on Michelle she'd smell like Motions and Cocoa Butter. Lol! Good stuff Mint Julep, good stuff.

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry but that was a tad offensive LOL.
You can be what most consider beautiful and have equal substance etc...wow LOL

Bellini said...

this was wholesomely good... i've already had a fella ask me "would i be his michelle" (lol) it's amazing what men pick up on!

mint julep said...

@ Rum Punch; Katt Williams is a fool.

@Anon; thanks for your comment but I think you misunderstand. I think Michelle is BEAUTIFUL, she's my kind of beautiful, but I've heard and read others opinions that are contrary. Furthermore there are gaggles of women who are beautiful and have substance...each of the Five is one such woman. The points I was making are 1) Black men don't often go for both but they should and 2) Black men should get beyond the traditional sense of what is beautiful in our community and go for more, like Barack. Hope that clears it up.

@ Bellini; Exactly! mint julep knows her stuff.

Courvoisier said...

I hear you Mint @ Anon with those 2 points. It seems that men can't really handle a strong black woman. In theory even the best say they can but in practice it is a different story. I don't want to generalize but there seems to be quite a but of black men that don't fully understand why we are the way that we are or how to complement that.

I personally think it has to do with years of stripping our brothas of their manhood over the generations and the obligation that sistas have of picking up the slack. Hopefully with the ever growing possibilities for US, we will be blessed with more prefect unions.

David said...

Black Love Will Reign Supreme!

As a black man who has said, on several occasions, that I cannot wait until I find my Michele I feel this post; however, I would be lying to myself if I didn’t acknowledge the ways the Obamalove story continues to underscore the belief that black men do not have and are not interested in serious, love filled, relationships with women who share their history, struggle, hopes and dreams--or who just know what its like to be followed around a store, unable to hail a cab, looked at by a waiter who thinks you don’t know how to tip or (insert random act related to microstressors caused by perceptions of race here).

On the one hand the love between our leading man and his fist lady is worthy of celebration. I think about all of the magazines that now have pictures of a beaming and beautiful first family as opposed to OJ Simpson, Kobe Bryant, R. Kelly or any other standard-bearers for all that’s messed up with our cousins and it makes me happy. On the other hand the incessant desire to perpetuate a story that focuses on the uniqueness of their union ignores the hundreds of thousands of black men and women who have been and will continue to be committed to the institution of marriage, the sanctity of the black family and the love they have for one another.

I ask that in moments of celebration we also acknowledge that there are couples, both recognized and not, who embody the love and commitment shown by our first couple. Similarly, there are black men who have not subscribed to mainstream notions of beauty--who love women who smell like coco butter, baby oil, Luster's pink or any of the other things we associate with our kind of people. While discussing this possible paradigm shift in black relationships its important to remember that black love has and will continue to reign supreme--whether mainstream media, or brothers unable to let go of their independence want it to or not.

mint julep said...

@ David; i love it when you coming out of hiding and comment. i would have "acknowledge[d] that there are couples, both recognized and not, who embody the love and commitment shown by our first couple" but this post would have gone on foreva. shouts out to my mama & stepdad; rum's parents; samuel and latanya; david patterson and his michelle; denzel and paulette; etc. etc.