WE ARE: 5 women navigating our twenties in search of peace, happiness and love (or not). WE WRITE: about everything and nothing. From the insane to the mundane- you will find different paths taken, lessons learned and lives lived. WE THINK: you’ll enjoy it...Warning: Consumption of these views may leave you enlightened while intoxicated.


The View From Here will conclude on Friday, October 1, our third year anniversary. We would like to spend this month thanking all of our readers, followers, haters, visitors, family, friends, and fans for your continued support, encouragement, and comments over these past few years. Thanks y'all!
-The Five Spot

Friday, November 13, 2009

Me, Myself and I

Localicious, do you watch Girlfriends? I’m asking Localicious because I know that she’s definitely our one reader. Lol. No, I’m kidding. Everyone out there, do y’all watch Girlfriends? Do you remember how after Toni married Dr. Todd, she found out that he was broke and deep in debt – which meant they were in deep debt, and yet she went out and bought this ridiculously expensive purse? That was kinda selfish.

And while Toni was never the most generous person, she definitely didn’t try to make any significant character changes once she got married. I mean ideally it should happen before you got married as you’re working on you (heh), but definitely after you got married, you should start learning the word sacrifice. And compromise. And wrong.

Anyway. I have been thinking about how one can become set in their ways. Settled in their singleness. Comfortable being companionless. I know an older woman who has never been married, who rarely dates, who recently got asked out by a seemingly nice man. And she hesitated. And seemed kinda annoyed by it. Like how dare he come all up in my space, wasting my time, asking me out on a date. Now, here I am at 28, like SQUEAAALLL!!! Are you gonna go? What are you gonna wear? And so on. And she’s looking at me like, “chile please.”

And as I get older and roam this Earth alone and start not really minding that I’m alone, I wonder, what will happen if someone comes into my life? Will I be able to consider someone else’s feelings? I mean the last time I was in a real relationship, if I came home from dinner and had leftovers – I hid them in the vegetable crisper cause I didn’t want to share!!!! That’s kinda selfish. Lol.

And um I’m still that same person. Probably worse now cause I really haven’t been with nobody in forever. But when there’s no one to hold a mirror to your relationship behavior, how do you know how you’ll be? Or how do you know that you'll be better than you used to be? And if you do know the things that you should change, your growth opportunities as it were, is it worth trying to become a better person when it feels like you might be alone for what seems like infinity?

And so then I was thinking about how maybe, perhaps, people who get all used to being single, alone, by they damn self, end up missing their blessing because wrapped up in their comfort can be routine and resistance. The routine of going from work to home to work to church to home to gym to work to hanging with the same friends to work to home. Vacation! Work to home to work. Resistance to newness. Resistance to changing one's self, or character, or circumstances. Or even just stepping out there into the unkown.

Cause being alone, even though there can be gripes and complaints, is easy. You know what to expect when it's just you. You don't have to answer to anybody. Or ask somebody what they want to eat. And then cook it. You know where you keep everything. And you know how you like everything kept. And you don't have "time" (that's in air quotes cause in reality you do have the time) or patience for no one to come messing things up. But maybe that's all just a front cause you're afraid of being part of a two cause you know that ish is hard. That is ish takes work. That ish takes all of you.

That’s my time y’all! Happy Rum Punch Friday!

You get the live, long version, cause Sony won't let me put up the video which I love! Shaking my fist at the man!

Thursday, November 12, 2009

words of wisdom for road weary women

over the weekend, i got into one of my bi-monthly funks.  you know how you just get annoyed with everything and everybody.  on saturday i was kinda feelin that way.  i was a lil sick and tired of living the single life.  f' what you heard. sometimes a woman needs the comfort of a man.  not sporadically but every day of the week.  to come home to.  to build with.  to pour all your love into.  or at least to accompany you to the late night spot to dance to ?uestlove on the turntables until the sun comes up.  i'm just sayin...

yes that was me.  and i still believe that women shouldn't be hunting marriage for marriage's sake.  marriage aint all its cracked up to be.  and what snapped me outta my funk this weekend was a call from a male friend of mine.  he got married this past june and is now feeling like his marriage is falling apart.  as i listened to him vent i had a couple of thoughts:

what that got to do wit me?
damn gina....you aint made it 6 months!!
ima need people to stop, look, pray, & discuss before they leap into marriage 

after talking to him, i let out a long sigh of relief.  despite all the challenges of being single, at least i don't have the headache of being legally tied to someone who i'm having second thoughts about sharing the rest of my life with.

and then, as i  usually do when i need to vent, i talked to rum punch about it and she made me feel soo much better.

me: yeah, ima just gon head and be single for [insert indefinite time period here] 
rum punch: lmao, that really made me laugh

me: craziness all around
rum punch: well you'll be single, until you’re not single cause someone worth your time will make u not wanna be single :-)

words to live by!

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

100 Yard Dash

Some my favorite music genre lies somewhere between Earth Wind and Fire and the Delfonics. Thanks to Mamma and Pappa Amaretto I love, enjoy and appreciate most music that was weeeeell before my time. When music was played by musicians and not computers. When singers could actually sang...and they looked like regular imperfect people-fat, ugly, wore their wigs crooked. I think those are the good ole days. I like the songs from the 60s and 70s because their songs were subtle. I'm not saying that folks weren't trying to get all up in each other's pants, but men at least took women to dinner first. They were all mad about having to buy a little $8 drink!

Take Slave's Watching You.

Do you notice that this song song is about stalking? I remember being in the car with my dad driving and we are both grooving when I realized this man is stalking this chick. But it was so clever and almost sweet. R. Kelly could never pull this off! Instead I get to hear how R. Kelly talking Invented Sex. Really Mister Kelly? Ugh!

Sometimes I feel like I was born in the wrong decade. I'm an eighties baby with a sixties baby's soul. I think that's why I am totally feeling this song. Raphael is channeling some good stuff with this!

Did you notice that he's singing about his attraction to this woman? He's not trying to "Superman" her or have her lick his Lollipop...well maybe he is. But I like the fact that he wants to sing her a little song first!

See You In Seven

Monday, November 9, 2009