WE ARE: 5 women navigating our twenties in search of peace, happiness and love (or not). WE WRITE: about everything and nothing. From the insane to the mundane- you will find different paths taken, lessons learned and lives lived. WE THINK: you’ll enjoy it...Warning: Consumption of these views may leave you enlightened while intoxicated.


The View From Here will conclude on Friday, October 1, our third year anniversary. We would like to spend this month thanking all of our readers, followers, haters, visitors, family, friends, and fans for your continued support, encouragement, and comments over these past few years. Thanks y'all!
-The Five Spot

Friday, February 5, 2010

The Seat Filler

Looking For Your Daddy Series - Volume 1, Issue 2

Hey y’all! So as I mentioned in the first episode (as it were) of ‘Looking for Your Daddy’ I have been going on lots more dates. The thing about it though is that these dates or should I say the men are nothing, if not haphazard. I’ll hear from them every few weeks, maybe once a month, talking bout “what you doin’ this weekend? Do you wanna… Go to lunch? Dinner? Movies? Out for drinks? Paris for the weekend – ok that last one is only happening in my dreams.

Rarely is there ever any real contact in between these times. If there is, it's a random text. An IM. An email. But they don't know the ins and outs of Rum Punch's real life. What I be going through on the daily. My experiences as a new homeowner. That I love what I do, but this place makes me wanna holla cause apparently my crazy co-worker is allowed to take naps during work hours. That I'm thinking of starting my own business. And so on.

Now Rum Punch is not one to turn down a chance to get out the house for free. And if you want to pay to enjoy my company, or for me to see a movie I been wanting to see, and for me to have some leftovers, well then it don’t make me no never mind. But this behavior has me wondering – do these nigs think they are truly courting me? Is this what’s hot in the streets now? Or to take it to an even more ignant level, wheredeydodatat?

Everywhere. According to Dark and Stormy.

This is how the modern man gets down, she said. They get bored, need someone to talk to, scroll their phone and then hit up 10 women at a time and wait until someone responds. Cool. Again not a problem cause I didn’t have anything planned for [insert whatever night here].

But I guess now that I’m older and allegedly wiser, I recognize that this behavior is some bull followed by that ish. But because I’m wiser, I know not to invest any ample time into this. I don’t have that inner sqqueeaaal when they contact me. I don’t analyze the text messages. I don’t try to crack codes. I don’t wonder, “wait”, hope, for him to call me. And when he does, I’m pleasantly surprised. Lunch is just lunch. Dinner is just dinner. A movie is just a movie. A walk to the car is just a walk to the car. And I just make pleasant conversation, give em some Rum Punch razzle dazzle, take my leftovers and throw up the deuces. Until the day that something else is otherwise communicated.

But I’m torn. In my heart of hearts, I do expect more. At the same time, I’m not really feeling these guys, so I could care less. And clearly they’re not truly feeling me or else they would bring their A game. Or at least like B+ game. This is just lazy. But sometimes I wonder, just for kicks, should I make them step up their game? Should I tell them their overall behavior is wack? Would that make a difference? But on the other side of that coin, if I were feeling them, I would probably kinda meet them halfway. Call them from time to time and make sure they’re breathing too. Heh.

So maybe this is just the game that single people play. Biding our time until something better, what we really want comes along. Filler people. Filler conversations. Filling meals. I mean you've got to do something to cut the loneliness, right? You can only have but so many cats and hobbies. At some point you're going to want to take someone or be taken out. Want to sit across from somebody and share your dreams, thoughts, and ideas. Want to have a semblance of a connection with another person to help you get through this thing called life. It's human nature, no? It's what keeps us connected to the world and helps us be optimistic about the future - well he/she ain't the one, but that must mean I'm that muchcloser to the one. It's become part of the modern day dating two step. It's understood. It's no surprise. Wheredeydodatat? Everywhere. Apparently.

That’s my time y’all! Happy Rum Punch Friday!

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

definition please?

It all started a month ago, when I came back from my vacay overseas. I found my self rummaging the pages of February's Elle edition with the former jenny from the block ... and the 'Betrayed Wives Club' authored by Mary Gaitskill hit me (pow)with the following:

What is faithfulness anyway?
"Can you be unfaithful to your own feelings and faithful to someone else?"
that's the million dollar question...
Is it faithful to lie in bed night after night with someone you love but no longer desire...?" that's enough, I'll stop right there....
i lied
"Is it faithful to be monogamous if that means deadening your own nature constantly in order to be genitally true to someone love but no longer have physical passion for?"

Time to pour a glass of wine...

I know a huzband who shared in mocking jest infront of his wife "Bellini, the only sin a man committs is bringing home the baby outside of the marriage. Don't bring no extra babies home. Right Bellini?!?" say whaaaaaaaaaaat!

Bellini couldn't entertain no stupid shit like that, and yet his wife clearly does. I won't even tell ya' how I invited the wife to an event downtown one night and instead her huzband shows up high or drunk couldn't tell the difference with a sweet, pretty young thing on his arms nope it wan't the wife either. He thought he saw a ghost when he seen my ass. Yeah ni$$a you ain't worth shyt fo' so! And I betcha ya'a benjamin- sweet, pretty young thing ain't have no clue huzband was a husband married with kids.
Don't ask me how I know, just know that I know!

If we give credence to Gaitskill's musings, perhaps the huzband is being just as he is - unfaithful to his wife and faithful to his feelings. And since I'm playing devil's advocate, can't I lay blame on the wife too. Isn't she a culpable member of this party of foolishness? Because she is technically condoning the shyt?

cheers (thanking the Lawd this isn't my life),


Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Into Infamy

This is Henrietta Lacks
Born in 1920 and Died in 1951

I often joke that I learned everything I know from television. I’m kidding…sort of. On Sunday night I was half paying attention to the news when the story of the woman above, Henrietta Lacks came on. Prior to this news story I had never heard of her. She was a Black woman who died at Johns Hopkins in Baltimore in 1951 from cervical cancer. When she died she was 31 and left behind a husband and five children. So what right?

The polio vaccine, cancer and viruses research, in vetro fertilization and gene mapping have been made possible with HeLa cells. HeLa cells are able to reproduce themselves an unlimited number of times outside of the human body. HeLa cells have been sold to many scientific firms and researchers for decades for sums that now total billions of dollars. These HeLa cells where taken, without permission, from the cancerous cells of Henrietta Lacks in 1951. The family that was left behind have not received any money from the use and reproduction of Henrietta’s cells...ever.

Add Image
Today, scientific journalist Rebecca Skloot’s book
The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks
will be released. I read this
excerpt after the news story aired and I must say that I am totally intrigued by Henrietta, her family and the HeLa cells. I found it even more interesting that some members in her family are unable to afford healthcare. Hmmmm. I know that all people are deserving of healthcare-but shouldn’t the Lacks family have a get healthcare free pass? I mean that have HeLa cells in them also. Or maybe at the very least can someone throw a couple dollars in the Lack’s family direction? I think I have far more than two cents to throw in on the subject of American institutions taking advantage of poor black folks for the sake of science or saBut I’ll keep my change and spare ya’ll…But it does ire and annoy me that medical and scientific research companies have greatly profited from this woman’s DNA. And I am not berating these companies for their research because humanity as a whole have benefited. But I think most of us learned to do the right thing some where around before the 1st grade...

This woman who worked as a Virginia Tobacco farmer to support her family. This woman who died a year after her daughter was born from a silent killer. This woman, a black woman who died in nearly 60 years ago, but who’s DNA has helped many beat cancer, concieve children and live longer than expected.
Stories like these make me wonder what else I don't know I don't know....

See You In Seven

Monday, February 1, 2010

Friending on Facebook

Like with any online activity, idividual users determine rules of conduct on the way they will behave. That is no different with Facebook.

I personally have one rule, I don't friend people I don't know. Some people I swear just go through their friend's friend list and befriend whoever is cute. I get this... but people, you can't really get to know someone on Facebook. But if you catch me on the right day, I might accept just to check out your pics then unfriend you without you even knowing. (chuckle)

This simple rule stops me from befriending people I met online or some person that saw me at a happy hour and would rather say wassup under the cover of the internet. URGH! (chuckle) It also stops me from befriending dudes I met during a brief time on an online dating site who I have yet to meet in person. (chuckle)

Anyway just recently, I had to get a little more specific with my general rule. I mean you tell me what you would do under these circumstances?

Do you friend your mom or her friends? I say "Yes to my mom and yes to her friends, especially if I consider them close or if I am friends with their kids" I am a grown-a$$ woman... I live a respectable life. (chuckle)

Which leads me to the next scenario, should I friend my friend's mom, if I never met her? Um... sorry, I defer to rule number 1. If I don't know you. No access.

Access, yes. Do you grant this to your ex-husband? I would like to say "Hell-to-the nah!" But you are friends with his friends... good point. Let's leave it at if he don't ask I won't. (chuckle) I am not trying to increase my friend count.

What about married couples you know, are you friends with both of them? Not in all cases. So to my married friends, if I only know your parnter in the context of you and met them once or twice under couple event circumstances... chances are we are not going to be FB best buds.

And how does your rule treat co-workers? Touchy one. I try to keep it to ones whose cell phone numbers are in my phone and we hang outside of work. However, I did have someone from work request friendship and when I didn't reply in what he would deem enough time approach me about it. Are you serious? I had to let him know to his face, if you have to ask me about it like it is a big deal maybe we shouldn't be friends. Be eas-Z, wee-Z! (chuckle)

Of course this ALL my opinion, so in the same token you can lay with whomever you please... I can friend who I choose ;)

Much luv and nothing but art in 2010... peace:)

Studio track throwback... "It ain't hard to tell, I excel, then prevail..."