WE ARE: 5 women navigating our twenties in search of peace, happiness and love (or not). WE WRITE: about everything and nothing. From the insane to the mundane- you will find different paths taken, lessons learned and lives lived. WE THINK: you’ll enjoy it...Warning: Consumption of these views may leave you enlightened while intoxicated.


The View From Here will conclude on Friday, October 1, our third year anniversary. We would like to spend this month thanking all of our readers, followers, haters, visitors, family, friends, and fans for your continued support, encouragement, and comments over these past few years. Thanks y'all!
-The Five Spot

Friday, February 19, 2010

I Get So Lonely

A while ago I mentioned that I was going to write a post about sometimes I wish I were a whore. But I decided to save it for another day. Well today’s the day. Lol. So as Courvoisier once wrote – everyone’s definition of a ho is different and susceptible to change depending on the circumstances. But for the purpose of this post I mean it as someone who sleeps with another woman’s man. Knowingly. On purpose.

So yeah sometimes I wish I was a whore or had ho like tendencies cause sometimes I get so lonely and I can let just anybody hold me. This article in the Washington Post was written by Lori Gottlieb, a 40 year old single woman who is now a single mother – she had a donor – she discusses how she wishes she had chosen Mr. Good Enough. We’ll get to that next week in our next Looking For Your Daddy episode. Today we’ll deal with the other half of the article. Being lonely. She writes:

It's not that women like her feel incomplete without a partner. And of course, not all women are looking for a long-term monogamous relationship. But still, if no man is an island, most women aren't either. How lonely it was, before I had my son, to wake up in an empty house every morning, eat breakfast alone, read the paper alone, do the dishes alone. How dispiriting it felt to move to a new place alone, to shop for groceries for only myself, to have nobody to talk to in those sleepy moments before bed except for girlfriends on the phone, chatting about -- what else? -- men.

But saying this aloud makes people uncomfortable. I got an e-mail from a never-married single mother like me who said that when she shared her loneliness on a single-mom listserv, people told her to stop feeling sorry for herself and to "get a life." One woman even suggested that if she was so unhappy being a single mother, she should put her child in foster care.

There is so much truth in this. I don’t think it’s PC for women especially if she got her own house, got her own car, two jobs work hard she a bad broad – to admit that she gets lonely. And f- all that dating and romanctical stuff. Sometimes she needs the weight of a man on top. Or just beside her in bed. Any man. An ex man. A young man. An ugly man. A dull man. Your man.

But women who love the Lord, have family and friends, travel, read books, have hobbies, see plays are not supposed to be lonely. Apparently that emotion was removed the day we got our college degrees. And as antiquated as it sounds, I think we heterosexual women who have partaken in D at lest once in our lives or ever been kissed real good can agree that there’s something about having a man around. The convos are different than with your girls. And sometimes they’re mo’ better. There’s flirting. And tingles. The heavy lifting gets done. The shoveling. The bug killing. The urges are met and tended to. There’s the sense of safety and security no matter how false it may be. I mean I think every single woman can belt out the chorus of Stephanie Mills’ Comfort of a Man and truly mean it.

And now as I get older and the nights get longer and the other side of the bed gets cold © Little Brother, and I'm not saying I would partake in such behavior, but I like Chris Rock, I understand how women can give up and say, “I’ll take your man” for the night at least. Shoot I had an opportunity presented to me recently. Don’t worry I passed. But fake intimacy can kinda sorta feel like the real thing if you close your eyes tight enough, no? Having someone in your bed, your space, your life, when it’s just you waking up alone, doing it all alone, looks good from a distance. And feels even better in reality.

Of course I know things always go badly when you try to do things the easy way. Heh. And so like Tupac told me to do, I keep my head up and try not to wallow in the feelings for too long. But sometimes I wonder if as you age, do things get worse or easier? Does the loneliness settle into your bones like arthritis and just become a part of you? And you just take two pills of reality and keep it moving? I know several Black women who’ve never married or been alone and the topic of loneliness is rarely discussed. And it’s a taboo subject. Cause when you’ve been blessed, you’re supposed to be happy at all times. You know.

But as I watch these women conquer the world, be that badd chick, I wonder if even in a room full of people do they sometimes feel totally and utterly alone? Do they sometimes cry in the dark? Or in the daylight on their way to work? Do they sometimes just want to lean into someone else’s arms to be held and feel weightless? I mean like George Clooney’s character said in Up in the Air: “Everybody needs a co-pilot. Life’s better with company.” Even if they can’t spend the night...

That’s my time y’all! Happy Rum Punch Friday!

Cause Dark and Stormy knows how much I'm loving this song...

Thursday, February 18, 2010

40 days and 40 nights

New Orleans is a big Catholic town and after they go hard during the Mardi Gras season, everybody settles down for Lent.
Lent, in Christian tradition, is the period of the liturgical year leading up to Easter. The traditional purpose of Lent is the preparation of the believer — through prayer, penitence, almsgiving and self-denial — for the annual commemoration during Holy Week of the Death and Resurrection of Jesus, which recalls the events linked to the Passion of Christ and culminates in Easter, the celebration of the Resurrection of Jesus Christ.
Although I'm not Catholic, I like that folks round these parts go without this vice or that indulgence for 40 days. And since I'm Christian I figure I can get in on Lent and give up a few things.

1. beef & pork
2. texting/calling these nigs
3. french fries
4. relations

What are you giving up for lent?

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

say something...

Hey folks, I'm sorry I've been MIA lately.

So this post today is devoted to saying something.

Check this out.
If you have the opportunity for Bellini's blessed hands to touch your resume, performance review write-up, etc. good things happen. Besides sprucing your language up to provide a more detailed understanding of your individual contributions, or a receiving a coveted call from HR providing a firm offer, and I could go on... So, there was a co-worker who felt undervalued and overworked. Not a good combination. So, a few Fridays ago, the weather was poor and she was trying to hike up I-95 before rush hour, and submit her resume to a prospective employer. So Bellini, asked how she could help. And since she's from NY, let's call her Brooklyn. Brooklyn hands me a hard copy of resume, job description, and career highlights and a soft copy of the same documents.

Bellini, just happen to have an afternoon telecon for the duration of the day. And Bellini can multi-task. So I revise, edit, and upgrade all documents. Unbeknownst to me, Brooklyn forwarded all my documents to prospective employer without even reviewing my deliverables, let alone proofreading. But ya know a professional shouldn't be caught dead with typos. Fast forward 2 weeks ago, Brooklyn was offered the job with elastic career potential in a recession. HOLLA!

Now Bellini has another colleague that whose work activity is being usurped from her and is sittin' idle. In some offices, sittin' idle just doesn't look good recession or no recession. Ironically enough, this colleague - we'll call her Lil'Bo Peep, was supposed to in my office. Where there is plenty of work to be had. When Lil'Bo Peep first came on board, I handed her my card and invited her to holla at me anytime. Do ya know had Lil'Bo Peep informed me of her background - her skill set would be a tremendous asset in my office- I would have her hooked her up with substantive work and positioned her to be placed back in my office. But noooooo, Lil'Bo Peep chooses to say nothing. I was enlightened about her skill set from a high-level senior employee in a roundabout way. And now, an administrative/support staff of the programmatic offices is leaving. And guess who management got to take the bait - Lil'Bo STUPID Peep. Girl, where is your brain? Your career is moving backwards!!! Do you think management could have gotten Bellini to take the bait, do you think management even identified Bellini as a sucker?

And Lil'Bo Peep is all chirpy like shit is good. But you know to each their own.
All she had to do was say something!



Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Teenage Wasteland

Back in the day I watched MTV all day everyday! I loved the Real World! From Real World Los Angeles to New Orleans, I watched the lives of 7 strangers taped and found out what happened when people stopped being polite. MTV was on as soon as I came home from school so I could watch TRL before people knew who Carson Daly was. What? What’s that you say? People still don’t know who Carson Daly is? Touche, that’s true. But you get my point. When I had cable it was me and MTV and then one day I couldn’t watch that crap anymore. Call it maturity, call it betrayal, but I started watching a lot of shows on CBS along with the growner, newer and sexier reality shows on TLC and Bravo. But then MTV came up with 16 and Pregnant and I came back anxiously ready to watch the lives of teen girls across America.

Each episode chronicles the struggles of young pregnant women as they deal with their significant others, parents, friends and impending motherhood. In most cases their thought processes and “logic” have me saying “this chick is going to be someone’s mother?” Seriously? It amazes me because I can’t even imagine having to care for a dependant organism I and I am well beyond my teen years; so I wonder how these women who live at home with the parents think that she and her unemployed baby daddy are going to be able to care for a life. Of course making a baby is easy, but there seems to be a major disconnect in the minds and plans of these teens. And that it what scares and entertains me as I watch. How can these women be so stupid? Don’t they know how hard life is or gets after high school? Life, in my humble opinion is not for the foolish or faint of heart!

So as I type I am watching the premiere of the second season of 16 and pregnant! This chick Janelle is crazy! She is staying in her mother’s house and yet she cusses at her mom like she’s one of her homegirls! I don’t know how they do it on the white side of North Carolina, but I know that I could not cuss my momma out in the house that she paid all the bills in. This speaks to the illogical thoughts of these teen mother’s, but also speaks to the fact that they are adolescents. Oh damn! This chick call her momma b*tch because her momma didn’t want to watch her baby! Are you serious?! Janelle’s momma needs to go get a belt and beat that a$$!

Just watch…

I think this show along with Teen Mom show the real trials of parenthood. It’s enough to scare any kid into abstinence or at most to have protected sex! Or at the very least to have them stop and think beyond the moment. And I think that’s a great thing!

See You In Seven

Monday, February 15, 2010

From Boy Toy to Daddy to Boy Toy?

Sometimes being an artist is hard.
You are constantly trying to remain fresh, new and relevant.
And as you get older you have to make decisions that don't compromise your essence.
That Je ne sais quo that makes you THE artist.
It doesn't matter the medium.
Sometimes it requires reinventing or just simply maturing.

For example (I am sorry) you can't change you image by getting married and having two boys and then the next album you drop is about getting freaky in the club. Those are conflicting images! Divorce or no divorce. This is especially when we have Trey Songz filling the void for the young boy toy so nicely. I expected more from you Usher... did you even mature a little bit?

I was digging this beat until I found out what you were saying... can't get down. (smh)
"you let her put her hands in your pants
be my little freak"

Much luv until next week... peace )