See I just want to come in, do my lil’ job, eat my cheese sandwich © Bernie Mac, get my hours of sick and vacay which I will use accordingly thank ya very much, collect my bi-weekly check and be out. I don’t wanna hear bout yo’ kids. I don’t hafta to go to lunch with you. I don’t wanna work my way up and climb some metaphorical ladder. I didn’t come here to make friends – I have those in my real life. I don’t wanna go to no stinkin happy hours. Or schmooze with the bosses. I don’t want to exchange business cards so we can connect. Network. And build. And talk about work some more. I don’t wanna gossip bout other co-workers. Heh. No, I take that one back. But what I don’t wanna do is be pulled into co-worker’s mess and drama with other co-workers. I don’t need no extra.
And yet God stays having a sense of humor cause right now I’m going through it at work. With a co-worker who isn’t hardly pulling her weight. Who falls asleep on the job. Who has a laissez faire – which is apparently French for I don’t gives two fux – attitude. The managers are afraid of her. HR ain’t touching her. She is persona nom grata around the office and her lack of work is affecting my work. You see because we are a “team.” And we have individual goals, but an overall team goal and she ain’t doing her part. And I’m tired of her being so extra. Extra lazy. Extra tired all the time. Always ready to go home at 10 in the am – heffa you just got here! And I’m bout ready to whup some ass.
Not just cause she ain’t pulling her weight, but because our program targets and serves girls in underprivileged neighborhoods in DC. That’s why I took this job. And I’m committed to doing a great job and making sure they receive a great service.
But y'all know I hate work, right? Riiight. And yet at the same time I curse my mama and daddy for raising me to have a work ethic and to hate mediocrity even more! And this heffa ain’t even mediocre – she’s subpar! And while it grinds my gears that she gets paid for such – it annoys me even more that there are hundreds of little Black and Brown girls missing out on a much needed program cause she don’t feel like doing it.
And no one’s making her. And she’s ok with that. I mean I guess she’s made it this far in life - putting in little or not effort. Why stop now? But this behavior just baffles me. Do you really need a manager on your ass to
But watching her not work makes my teeth ache. And my skin crawl. And my blood boil. Makes me wanna holla, throw up both my hands and then use both hands to slap the mess outta her and say, “Get your old ass offa facebook and DO SOME M-IN-FIN WORK! And stop playin the scary big Black woman, got these lil white women shook, role and DO SOME M-IN-FIN WORK!” It makes me wanna do better. And sometimes it makes me wanna quit. But more than anything it makes me wanna get on my grind, and follow my real dreams, cause it reinforces what I’ve always known – this working thing is for the birds. And the horses.
That’s my time y’all! Happy Rum Punch Friday!