what's the scenario?.?.?

It had been 6 months, and I had yet to meet the famous Dr. Savannah Moore. All I knew of her, was that she was an old-timer, senior executive who was on temporary relocation traveling to Singapore and Thailand, Botswana and South Africa all on the company's dime. And I assumed she and her husband were having a fcuking blast! Kids grown, done with college. Hubby retired, and enjoying the ride. Well, Dr. Moore returned to headquarters after her 6 month sabbatical and I met her. And in a roundabout kind of way, my admiration for this renaissance woman diminished, pretty much flatlined.

Upon participating in an office happy hour, I was informed that Dr. Moore is only married to her work. See Dr. Moore ain't married and never been married. No kids to boot either. Now granted Dr. Moore may have never desired to be married - it's her right after all. But I suspect somewhere along the way she didn't master the art of balance.
on to the next

Ms. Thang never liked me from jumpstreet. Felt another sista would steal her shine ain't their room for everybody? She was used to being the sole sister on top of her shit. She wrongly assumed she was the only sister savvy in international affairs 'til she met Bellini and got her bubble busted. So, that resentment continues to imbue our office dynamics. She's a snake and I know it - so I keep a distance... proof is in the pudding

A few months ago, I had short-deadline on a briefing. So a senior colleague and myself committed 72 hours to completing the project. Now Bellini, is a sucka for fruit. It was like 8 p.m. and I inform colleague - "I have raspberries in the fridge-time to take a break", but since I was relatively new I didn't know the code to the kitchen's suite. And the snake's office is adjacent to the kitchen's suite. Now my colleague and I summoned all bodies to reply yea if present - not a soul replied. So, fast forward a few months and the snake shared, "oh yeah - I was there that night working. I heard you guys. I tend to work late all the time. "But why?" I countered, "any pressing projects?" No not really. a dumb fool

Am I surprised that her former fiancee left her ass hanging and called off the engagement/wedding? Nope - 'cuz her sneaky ass is nasty and she doesn't have a life. What man in his right mind wants to wake up to that? When another colleague informed me that the security guard expressed, "She's fine, but her attitude is fcked up!" Yup, you're a nasty heffa. 'cuz for one, the security guard doesn't know you beyond a hello. So, if your ass can't extend/reciprocate a greeting in the morning... don't be confused if you can't keep a man let alone a nice one!

So during happy hour, the snake was quick to tell me under the guise of office camaderie of course, her man must have a laundry list of qualities. She fired off her list, like she was a drill sargeant. And I'm lookin' at her - like chill ain't we human after all. And of course all qualties evolved around money and stature - none about character. The former are fleeting and the latter has permanence. And she falls into the trap of most women seeking the relative tentative qualities and overlooking the most vital characteristic.

the verdict

Now Bellini, has been away for most of the chatter surrounding black women and their woes. I haven't seen any videos, nor read any transcripts. Chicas, gimme a fucking break! Half of ya in your current state - are not marriage material. You don't know how to compromise and you're not willing to put in work.

When most of ya were broke while accumulating degrees and shit, you should have been humbled by your former self. Humbled enough to realize your current state was a transient one.

Food for thought

One of my brothers is second year law student, made the law review his first year. Never been in debt until law school, and when he graduates next year will eliminate his debt within his first year of post-law school employment. His girlfriend graduates from her graduate school program in May. They've been dating since undergrad. Some may perceive him to be a catch upon sealing his fate as a lawyer. But perception is a bitch. He was a "catch" before he sealed his fate. His girlfriend knew that when he was the bookworm in calculus, had no clue my brother wanted to do law, because upon graduation from college he didn't what the hell he wanted to do with his life. Things that make you go hmmmm....

so, i figured I'd highlight two professional women of my company names changed of course. And although, I don't know them on a personal level - I know enough to know they're married to their work. Ladies, you must have balance. But you must master the art of balance first. Also, men are equal opportunist, plenty have told me so. Don't confuse your affinity and allegiance for brothas - it's not the same thing.

cheers,

Bellini