WE ARE: 5 women navigating our twenties in search of peace, happiness and love (or not). WE WRITE: about everything and nothing. From the insane to the mundane- you will find different paths taken, lessons learned and lives lived. WE THINK: you’ll enjoy it...Warning: Consumption of these views may leave you enlightened while intoxicated.


The View From Here will conclude on Friday, October 1, our third year anniversary. We would like to spend this month thanking all of our readers, followers, haters, visitors, family, friends, and fans for your continued support, encouragement, and comments over these past few years. Thanks y'all!
-The Five Spot

Monday, March 17, 2008

The Big Payback

Hey! Gotta gotta pay back!! (The big payback)
Revenge!! I’m mad (the big payback)
Got to get back! Need some get back!! Pay back! (the big payback)
That’s it!! Payback!!! Revenge!!!
I’m mad!!!

The Payback, James Brown

I am mad as hell today. Pissed off. Fuming. Infuriated. Seeing red.

You know the saying when it rains, it pours? Well I’m drenched.

My tax refund was intercepted by the thugs I borrowed money from to pay my tuition. Yes, I was behind on a couple of payments but I’m sorry that the cost of everything has risen in the past few months while my salary hasn’t increased nary a cent. So I have to play “Wheel of Payments” when its time to pay the bills. The object of the game is to spin the wheel to see who will be paid this month. Sorry Sallie Mae- Washington Gas, AT&T Wireless, Mortgage Company, and Dark & Stormy’s Cupboard beat you, but try again next month! Here’s a free spin chip for the next round…

Now I know I’m wrong for not paying the thugs on time. But did they have to take the entire refund? Don’t they know a poor person such as me had BIG PLANS for $2K? The crib needs painting. A new stereo for mom’s birthday. Airfare & hotel for summer trip to Trinidad. A digital camera, ‘cause I’m the only person still dropping off my disposable camera to the CVS. And a lil’ sumthin' for the savings account. Why not take half? Two thirds?

I know, I know… That’s not how things work for the underdog. And the thugs want their payback.

So when I realized they took the money, I was upset but wasn’t really sweatin’ it. I figured I’ll just have to settle for a road trip to the beach this summer and add the other items from my to-do list to the “Wheel of Payments”. I gave the thugs a phone call to determine my new balance since they had just received a hefty payment. The conversation went like this…

Call Center Rep: Ms. Stormy, it takes 7 to 10 business days for any recent payments to be reflected in your balance.

D&S: So you can snatch up my money immediately but cannot post it to my account with the same swiftness?

Call Center Rep: That’s correct.

D&S: Okaaaayyyy (Wasn't ready for that response)...
Well when everyone is done twiddling their thumbs, can you please send me a statement in the mail documenting the amount you intercepted and the remaining balance?

Call Center Rep: Yes ma’am we can. Also we need you to make a $XXX.XX payment to bring your account current. We can assist you in working out an affordable plan for payment during subsequent months.

Starting to see red.

D&S: Umm… Didn’t you just take a couple thousand from me? That was just about half of what I owe you. Subtract your down payment from that.

Call Center Rep: The refund intercept cannot be counted as a down payment because it was not a voluntary payment.

Temperature rising and palms getting sweaty.

D&S: LOL! Excuse me for laughing, but I’m at work right now so I can't let anyone see me cry. Only white girls can cry on the J-O-B and still be considered competent individuals.

Call Center Rep: Ms. Stormy if you do not bring the account current, our next step will be pursuit of wage garnishment.

Rising up outta my chair, mind cloudy with visions of kickin’ ass .

D&S: What in the hell? Haven’t you garnished enough for one week? Y’all are straight trippin’! This conversation is so over. WTF…


I’m mad.

I want revenge. I want revenge. I want revenge.

Tumultuously Yours,

Dark & Stormy

** Called back later that evening and set up payment arrangements. I may be a fool at times but I ain’t crazy. Damned thugs. **


Gangsta D said...

My question is, how does Sallie Mae find you? I swear I moved twice, changed my number both times, and they STILL found me. And now they can just snatch your check without you knowing? They have to be in cahoots with the NSA.

Always.Funky.Fresh said...

This is exactly the reason why I've got the all black outfit, black timbs and black hoodie on standby.

Let me know who and when we're bumrushin'. It's about to be on....

quarter-life-crisis said...

Oh my gosh! That is my worst fear. I try my best to pay them. Its like my bills come in this order:
1. Car note - to get to work to get the lousy paycheck.

2. Car insurance - what the use in paying the car note and not pay this. Plus I have a bad driving record and tend to hit things, cars, signs, etc.

3. Sallie Mae - My credit is bad enough. They recieve $300.00 a month and its not hitting the $50,000 I owe them at all.

4. Gas - Cannot get to work on air.

5. Food

6. All other bills (just take turns paying them)

Luckily I live with my aunt because I just moved to the area and trying to get on my feet, but with the gas prices and my bills, seems like that will never happen.

I know that this will not make it better, but know that you are not by yourself!

Dirty Red said...

I co-sign with Quater-Life-Crisis on this one.
I owe Sallie mae also. I am all out of deferments, so I will be "trying" to make my $250 a month payment. And to top it all off, I am paying for a damn degree that i ain't even using!!!

Ain't that some shit?

So don't feel bad Boo.
I got my black hoody, black tims and black jeans at the ready also. Plus I got partna's still in the game.
So holla if you need me!!