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The View From Here will conclude on Friday, October 1, our third year anniversary. We would like to spend this month thanking all of our readers, followers, haters, visitors, family, friends, and fans for your continued support, encouragement, and comments over these past few years. Thanks y'all!
-The Five Spot

Monday, October 20, 2008

Interview with a Cyberstalker

In this day and age, you not only have to be careful what you say but be careful what you write. With blogs and social networks, like facebook and myspace, anyone with internet access can find out what’s happening in your little world. Everyday we upload our latest pics and post comments on our friend’s blogs without thinking that someone out there in cyberland is using our online activity to track our whereabouts.

It wasn’t until I sat down with two ladies from work for lunch that I realized…cyberstalking was a lot more common than I thought. Here I was in the presence of a grown woman telling me about how some guy told her he was too exhausted to go out with her, but she had seen photos posted by his friends of him partying the night that he was supposedly too exhausted. Go figure. He lied. What is the big deal? I am telling you, I thought only crazy b!tches be checking the date/time and reading all the comments from a guy you only went out with once. It is like ease dropping on a conversation or sitting in your car outside his house! Normal people, at least so I thought…don’t do this. I have to say this type of behavior intrigued me.

Now we all know online activity is definitely reviewed in criminal cases so we won’t venture down that road in this interview but I am trying to get an idea of the satisfaction achieved in cyberstalking.

Everybody, here are a few lines from my interview with a cyberstalker, who will remain nameless.

C: First and foremost, do you consider yourself a cyberstalker? (chuckle)

S: No, not at all. I mean it just helps to know a little about a person before you meet them in person.

C: Okay, I can see that. But do you just search people online you have heard of, but never met? Or do you search to find out information about people that you know?

S: Well…both. Sometimes you want to know what is going on in a person’s life and it is just easier to just read up on their blog post, comments and view their pictures.

C: Did you ever just think about sending them an email or giving them a call?

S: He, he…yes, I could do that but this seems like a more legit way to get the answer. Sometimes you can’t ask the person.

C: Really? Hint. Hint. I am curious…how many people do you actually think write the whole truth on these social blogs or only upload the funny or good pictures? Did you ever stop think that their online persona is a little different from real life?

S: Yeh…that is true but there is some truth…

C: But how do you tell what is fiction from non-fiction? Isn’t this all a form of entertainment?

S: Not always.

C: Hmm…tell me more about your thought process. What types of things do you conclude from your findings.

S: Well, let’s say that he posts a comment about how exhilarating it would be to cheat on his girlfriend…I can assume that he would most likely cheat on me.

C: Ha, ha…not to be facetious but the key word is IF. People say stuff online all the time that might not necessarily be truthful. Don’t get me wrong you might be onto something but you can’t make a judgement on that alone.

S: I don’t. I see this research as a way of getting to know someone. In some ways you are more familiar with the person and feel closer to them.

C: (chuckle) Did you say “feel closer”?

So what’s up peeps…does it make you “feel closer”? If you read my post and comment every week for a year, should I consider us BFFs?

And if that is the case, I better watch what I write. (chuckle)

Until next week...peace :)


IntrospectiveGoddess said...

Ok first off I just want to say that what homegirl did is very common.

Now I do believe that you can get a little insight from someone's online profiles. She did find out that he lied so that saved her a headache if she planned on pursuing him for something serious.

So the truth can be found beneath what some consider online "personas"

And I have heard of people being good friends just from reading each other's blogs, there are blog writer, meet ups and romances.

Granted you cant know everything about someone from a face book profile or a few blog posts but its always good to do your research.

Many of cheaters have been caught just from a simple google search or their own myspace profile, so dont sleep.

I really dont think she was stalking the man, she found out what she needed to know to preserve herself..I really dont think its as serious as stalking out around his house in the middle of the night....

Jarrod Halsey said...

"So what’s up peeps…does it make you “feel closer”? If you read my post and comment every week for a year, should I consider us BFFs?"

Not even remotely. Its like the same relationship you have with your favorite artist or reality tv star. Sure, you've seen/heard them bare their souls for all to see. But at the end of the day, you don't know them. Until you interact face-to-face basis with someone for a consistent amount of time, you just know things ABOUT them, you don't really KNOW them

Torrance Stephens - All-Mi-T said...

i guess that means im stalked several times weekly

Anonymous said...

I believe the appropriate term for it is "Illegal Private Investigating" hehe

EmailRevealer.com said...

It's unlicensed investigating.
But you could hire a PI to do it right. Loacte and identify the person behind a personal ad, find out what other sites he's on and run a background report.
It's worth it. Alot of people you find on dating sites are also on S&M sites and swinger sites.

Christina said...

i think that for some, 'cyberstalking' does make them feel closer to the stalkee (is that even a real word, lol). for all the technology we have, we're all becoming a lot more socially retarded. in a way it is easier to share ourselves online & not have to physically see others' reactions. it's also easier to try to glean info about someone without having to navigate the incredibile ackwardness that can result from in person investigation. but this is the world we live in. for better or for worse.