WE ARE: 5 women navigating our twenties in search of peace, happiness and love (or not). WE WRITE: about everything and nothing. From the insane to the mundane- you will find different paths taken, lessons learned and lives lived. WE THINK: you’ll enjoy it...Warning: Consumption of these views may leave you enlightened while intoxicated.


The View From Here will conclude on Friday, October 1, our third year anniversary. We would like to spend this month thanking all of our readers, followers, haters, visitors, family, friends, and fans for your continued support, encouragement, and comments over these past few years. Thanks y'all!
-The Five Spot

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Just Friends...and Not Lovers?

A girl I know recently planned a weekend solo trip to Vegas in December. And while most of us single gals are willing to take on the world alone, we still ask a friend to tag along just in case. So this girl, let’s just call her Natalie asked the male friend she’s known since they were making mud pies in the sandbox to come along for a weekend of debauchery and Cirque de Soleil, to which he was more than willing to agree to. So I said to Natalie that this was beginning to sound like a storyboard for a “What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas” commercial-two longtime friends alone in Sin city! Blowing on each other’s dice! To which Natalie scoffed because for as long as I’ve known her she’s sworn that she and her friend are strictly friends and never once has she had the thought of taking it to the next level. And the thought quite honestly makes her sick to her stomach. So me being the fun person that I am, inquired that what if he’s been secretly in love with her all these years, and has been waiting in the wings for the chance to cross the line… I think Natalie was queasy at this point as she went on to say that she could never imagine herself walking down the aisle to her friend…but no one is talking about marriage, just fcuking a friend who has known you since you were brace faced and acne riddled.

You see folks, I find it very hard to believe that males and females can just be friends; so Natalie-n-friend just doesn’t make any sense to me. I guess because, for me myself personally I don’t have any male friends who have just been my friend. Not saying that every male I know wants to do me…but of the males who I have spent time with, let them get to see Amaretto with all the rights and privileges that that entails…there was always that one moment or one conversation when nerve was mustered and a proposition was made. Please don’t get me wrong, I have male friends now that I can hang out with and shoot the breeze with…but our relationship was formed after my shock wore off and I was like “Dude? Really? We’re just friends.” And into the friend zone we go…

And I’d totally be playing myself if I didn’t admit that there are several of these same fellas that I decide to spend my time with that I have thought about in more than the platonic way. Doesn’t the old adage state the friends make the best lovers? So who better to fantasize about than the guy who can make you laugh, helped you bury your skeletons, knows you are crazy and still sticks around? And so knowing of my own secretly lustful thoughts about some of the fellas I know, Natalie claiming that thinking of her friend in that way makes her sick is a fact that’s hard for me to believe, let alone buy.

I think I need to give Natalie a copy of
When Harry Met Sally. Can men and women just be friends? It seems to be the question we all ask ourselves after we ponder why we are here on Earth. I think that there was always a moment when one person in a multi-gender friendship felt that Platonic was a four letter word that block them from possibly the best relationship they could have ever had.

I am of the thinking that everyone has thought about poking or being poked by their buddy of the opposite sex at least once…right?

See You In Seven


cinco said...

Strictly platonic?Perhaps if no clear sexual interest. I think it could work for a brief while but long lasting depends on maturity.

mjr-banx said...

If I didn't marry a male friend then I would disagree...but every guy I know would agree.

Can't you also say the same for women though? I mean we might not have thought of sleeping with them but their has to be some attraction that makes us friends.

Honey Devereaux said...

You are correct! We all have thought about it once, but few are honest about it.

Natalie said...

Great Amaretto now everytime said friend does something unexpected, I have to lift an eyebrow!!!

Last night, I was leaving pottery and usually I have to tell him to walk me to my car...but last night when I was leaving before him, he asked if I needed him to walk me to my car.

Very unexpected, especially since I always have to beg him as a MAN to do so.