A Paper Torn

Just like the BET awards, its now my turn to share my Michael Jackson moment! Watch out for the bandwagon!

I first learned about Michael in front of a giant floor model television (you know the ones that took most of the living room and held everything from family pictures, to a newer television on top) at my grandparents’ house. My cousin, who is a couple months older loved her some Thriller, for me, it was all about Billy Jean. Before knowing anything about paternity tests or baby momma dramas, I knew I loved walking on the title floor squares-wishing they would light up. And because adult folks love getting free entertainment from the antics of their kids, I was totally encouraged to sing, throw my pretend hat and spin around until I fell. There was laughter, there was clapping and most importantly there were some good times! And that’s what Michael’s music conjurers up for me, good times at the party, good times at the cookout, good times dancing in the car at a red light while a cop looks over, smiles and shakes his head (that was just Friday night).

Mike’s music was great but his life definitely had its ups and downs. As I listened to the media folks a lot of outlets in mainstream America could not resist bringing up old shyt- the child molestation case, his changing appearance, the fact that he may or may not be broke. Meanwhile, back in the Black community there was nothing but love. Sure, during Mike’s life we all cracked jokes, talked about how weird he was, wondered how unhuman he was going to make himself look after it was all said and done. But in my community, in death there was nothing but respect for a man who gave us good times. Even my pastor was moonwalking in the pulpit on Sunday…of course he tied it all together with Jesus and our salvation…but still, some Amens were shouted and everyone got up on their feet.

One of the things that I have been thinking about for the past few days was Mike’s reputation. While we all loved Michael Jackson the entertainer, we knew something wasn’t quite right with the man. It’s interesting to me that even in his death the downs he experienced in his life are eclipsing his philanthropy, the conscious messages in his music or even his humanitarian work. There is an Asian (can’t recall if its Chinese or Japanese) saying that addresses speaking badly about people. In the beginning, it’s like Michael Jackson was a whole piece of paper. And over years pieces of him were torn up and scattered around by lawsuits, leeches, loneliness and low self esteem. And as the saying goes, no matter how long you search for these torn scattered little pieces you cannot put the paper back whole again. Why? Because some pieces are taken by others or destroyed in their environment. Some pieces you just can’t recover…no matter how hard you try. And I think that maybe in the end Mike was just tired of trying to get back the pieces that were lost. But me no know, I’m a 20 something in DC who only knew Michael Jackson through his music. But I hope that he has peace and is finally whole now.

See You In Seven