WE ARE: 5 women navigating our twenties in search of peace, happiness and love (or not). WE WRITE: about everything and nothing. From the insane to the mundane- you will find different paths taken, lessons learned and lives lived. WE THINK: you’ll enjoy it...Warning: Consumption of these views may leave you enlightened while intoxicated.

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The View From Here will conclude on Friday, October 1, our third year anniversary. We would like to spend this month thanking all of our readers, followers, haters, visitors, family, friends, and fans for your continued support, encouragement, and comments over these past few years. Thanks y'all!
-The Five Spot

Friday, April 9, 2010

How Low Can You Go?

Hey y’all! How’s it going today? So, admittedly I am getting old. When listening to the radio, I tend to go from gospel, to oldies, then to the other oldies/neo soulish station, then if there are no good options, I head to the stations where hip hop lives. Or dies a slow death. What up Nas. Anywho. I had heard that Usher song, the one with Nicki Minaj, but like a 12 year old was just caught up in the beat. And not really hearing it, ya dig? But being the old person that I am when Nicki would rap, I would be like, “why does it sound like she’s talking to another girl?” And then…

Dark & Stormy sent me this article, titled I Done Had About Enough, and Raving Black Lunatic was talking about how in that said song Usher and Nicki are talking about a ménage a trois. And I was like sayyyy whhaaat? Is that what they are talking bout? Hold up. Wait a minute. No. I immediately responded to Dark & Stormy with a what the hell? I checked with Mint Julep. “Yeah chile. And you gotta check the video,” she said. I headed over to youtube and after finding the uncut video was asked if I were 18 years old. Mercy. I watched. And listened to the lyrics for the first time. And was dead at:

If you're fcukin with me
Really fcukin with me you go get some girls and bring them to me
If you fcukin with me

Really fckuing with me you let her put her hands in your pants
be my little freak


Ummm… No, thank you? I’m not going to go into how I can’t believe that they play this mess on the radio. And I know that I came up in the era of Lil’ Kim’s I used to be scared of the dyck and put it in your mouf in your m-in-fin mouf, and West Coast gobble a dyck Explosive. But um er…those songs from what I can remember were not played on the radio. But that’s not the point of this post. The point is…

This is why these nigs have no damn sense! Rum Punch are you blaming rap music? Yes, I am! Is that fair? No, it’s not. But it’s Friday, my day, so just let me write it yo! Heh. And I’m really not just blaming rap music, but just how oversexed and inappropriate we are becoming as a society. Like how is it ok for someone to say, you know what the music world is missing right now, is in desperate need of at this very moment, what the people really need to hear - a song where I can tell a chick to put her hands in another chick’s pants. A song where I can peer pressure a chick to bring me back some hos. Cause you must not be fcukin' with me if you won't do it. And no one is like that’s crazy? You can’t put that on the radio? M’kay. I weep for these babies. And for us ladies of this current generation for that matter.

Cause a dollar to a donut, some guy will repeat this lyric (or a variation of) to a woman and think it’s ok. I mean cause wasn’t she just shaking her ass to it on the dance floor two seconds ago, anyway? Some girl will get asked point blank if she would ever go to a sex club. Some unsuspecting woman is gonna open her phone and see a text message of his d**k in a box. Like that’s ok. Some guy will "slyly" ask you to have a threesome. Or want you to send him a video of you. Some guy will get his Tiger Woods on and text some foul ass, this muhfcuka done lost his mind, does yo’ mama like you, type texts. I mean did y’all see those Tiger Woods texts? My homegirl and I were joking that he put Kwame Kilpatrick to shame. Kwame was like ‘yo come give me some head.’ Tiger was like, “lemme pee on you” © Dave Chappelle. Like this is ok.*

But apparently it is. Cause who’s saying it’s not ok? I remember hearing Sister Soulja speak years ago in undergrad and she was talking about hip hop's disrespectful lyrics about women and how we ladies be like, “oh, but he [insert your favorite rapper here] ain’t talking bout me. He talkin’ bout that ho’ over there.” Uh huh. Yeah. Ok.

But it’s only a matter of time until you’re that ho. Or approached like you are one at least. No matter how classy you are. No matter that you don't get down like that. Or come off like that. And you don't dress like a ho. Or act like a ho. No matter if you got a degree, a job and you pay a mortgage and all yo' utility bills. No matter that you're a QUEEN and you command respect and he shoulda known better than come at you like that. No matter if your response will be 'oh hell no' and you done lost your mind. No matter if he was just tryin you to see how far you were gonna go. The point is, he's gonna think it's ok to expect you to go low, lower than you know. Oh and then while you're down there, could you just go ahead and let her put your hands in your pants?

That’s my time y’all! Happy Rum Punch Friday!

*And please note I'm not talkin' about what you do with your boo to keep things fun and interesting. I'm talking about strangers. When you have to pause and be like 'nygga didn't we just meet'... Why would you think this is ok type ish...

13 comments:

mint julep said...

exactly!

kamakula said...

Umm, I have to say I'm not sure I understand the indignation. There has been plenty of songs played on the radio for the past 14-15 years (as long as I've been listening) that features men telling women what to do and how to do it to their stuff.

So now that a woman is the one doing the telling it's an issue? Or is it because it's a woman doing this for the benefit of a man? In that case is this a it's one thing for a man to pimp out a woman, but another for a man to have a woman do the pimping for him?

kamakula said...

besides, one on one sex is now played out. Gotta take things to the next level and "keep it fresh"

Rum Punch said...

@ MJ - Heh.

@ Kamakula - First of all, I'm too mad at you for your second comment! HAHAHA!

Second of all, I see what you're saying and that's why I had a small disclaimer that I know these songs have been out here. And I know there are some "horrible" ol' school songs I know allll the words to. Lol. And maybe I'm just getting old - but I think that yes, when you bring a chick into the mix and start talking about threesomes in front of "company", then you've crossed or erased the line that is decorum. And it's not just rap music. I think that with technology and the ease of getting in touch w/ each other - boundaries have been erased. Personal space is non existent.

And finally, sure men have been tryna get in women's pants since the beginning of time. But if you gonna do it and make a song about it. Do it right. This way is just not sexxy. I'm sorry - there's many a song where Marvin Gaye slyly throws in some freaky ish. And in 'I'd rather be with you' at the end Bootsy is all I'm gonna keep comin', and comin'. It's slick. It's subtle. And it's not all, clap your ass cheeks and show me those teeth.

Amaretto said...

LOL @ one on one sex is now played out! That's too funny Kamakula!

This song is pure foolishness. And the music we listened to was also foolishness. Everything is relative! And you got to love this song's beat and Stevie Wonder sample. That's what I listen to. Until Courvoisier had said it, I didn't know Nikki was reciting A Night Before Christmas in her rap!

Rum Punch said...

@ Amaretto - Yesss! That's the other thing. Why is this chick calling out the reindeer? I literally put on my FB page, please explain this to me like I'm a 14 year old. Is this supposed to be clever? My mom is talking to teen girls tonight about boys. And I was like, "mama. Ask them about Ursher's song. Use that as a starting place." Because I think this blatant disrespect can really mess with a young girl's head. Like I'm old enough to be like that's crazy.

Yes, in retrospect our music was also foolishness. But dare I say it was a wee bit better. But I guess that's the old head in me talkin.

Anonymous said...

A beautiful Struggler did a nice piece on Marvin Gaye but it correlates here also...

Vulgarity can be heard by the ears of children, something nuanced however is heard by the mature.

Thats the biggest difference between yesterday and now, its just ALL out there, like naything goes.
Also the bigger issue is that multi-media often "programs" folk and there is the more inherent danger, like Rum Punch was getting at, not only for our generation but these younger adolescents/teens....when at those ages they need to be building self esteem, value and worth, learning what and how important integrity is, being truthful, having honor and self control are etc..Lord have mercy...warp the minds and everything esle will follow right?

Rum Punch said...

@ Anon - this line Vulgarity can be heard by the ears of children, something nuanced however is heard by the mature. is greatness! And the rest of your comment pretty much sums it all up. I mean even as a grown woman, I have to stand firm, hold my ground with these nigs and be like, "no. I don't get down like that." And then deal with the "rejection" cause another chick will. But when you like 14/15/16. Mayne! That type of rejection hurts your heart. These are the things I think when I'm watching 16 and pregnant - but that's a whole 'nother post. Lol.

dark n stormy said...

Yes honey, the days of boundaries are over (apparently)! And to think the hippie flower childs of the 70s were condemned for free love and "community" sexing... lol.

We already know the radio industry aint worth a damn... how can you be concerned with bleeping words like bitch and ho, yet play songs frequently like Lil Freak, Rude Boy, and Neighbors Know My Name (which should all be rated NC-17). And yet e. badu is the one exposing us to indecency. On the other hand, censorship is tricky and highly controversial in these here [free] States. I think it's also easy to forget that the commercial radio stations playing skrip club music dressed as top 40 hits are not public - meaning they don't care about the public's opinion because the public doesn't pay them. It's so easy and FREE to listen to... just turn on the radio. Heh

And though there is nothing new under the sun (including songs about threesomes and men soliciting women to participate in them), this out in the open-dont give damn-disrespectful-discretion deez attitude seems to be quite modern. How scary.

Sorry for the long comment... And Usher gets a "C'MON SON!!!" for associating himself with such crap. I expect more from an artist of his caliber. He doesnt have to dip in the gutter to sell a record. What's next? Justin Beiber on the remix? GTFOHWTBS Usher.

Rum Punch said...

@ Dark n stormy - LMAO @ alladat. And yesss you betta PREACH! I for one was like, "um is this the same 'Here I Stand' Ursher?" Cause I was totally feeling the growing up Usher. This is like what are you a horny 15 year old? Boy you had a wife and two stair step babies. Go sit down somewhere. Thanks.

MrsMeany said...

RP -
her name is nicki minaj...that shoudda been a tip that she'll sing about a menage a trois and anything/everything else (including reindeer!) hahaha
the music that they play on the radio is a pay-for-play bidness. i live in NYC and whenever i listen to Hot 97, they play the SAME.DAMN.MUSIC all damn day long. (so much so that i know ALL of the words to these dumb ass songs! hahaha) it's as if NO other songs exist besides those made by Jay-Z (i heart Jay, so i can't knock his hustle!), Trey Songz, Young Money, Lil Wayne or about some damn Bentleys-Benz-and-Beamers!!! hahaha
"our" music wasn't that much better, but when you're 19, you're not really LISTENING to the words, you're just dancing to the music, right? now that we're a lot older than 19 we're like HOLD THE F UP??? whut did he just say? i KNOW that she didn't say that??

in a nutshell: we've become our MOTHERS! hahaha

(i agree with anonymous AND i agree with you...i wanna tell Usher: gositchoassdown!! he doesn't have to go "there" to sell records!)

Rum Punch said...

@ Mrs Meany - LOL! Well it's easy to get all those b's turned around. Look at them using alliteration and erythang. That's what I would use if I were teaching English to these babies.

Anywho. Can we talk about that I am getting oh so OLD cause I didn't even put two and two together or is that three and three together about Nicki Minaj's name?!? I just thought that was her middle name or she was being all extra creative. And I see now that she was. Lol. Lawd have mercy.

MrsMeany said...

@ RP-
hahahaha...don't worry, I'se slow too! We have too much going on to make the HIP HOP connection! for reals...