No patience...

Last week, I confirmed something about my personality. I think I already knew this but it is officially written in stone now.

I can only do the pity thing but for so long before I snap into get-it-together mode and do something! It is the only way I feel like I am actually getting over it is by doing something, try, no matter what I predict the outcome will be.

Which brings me to my share-all story today. I have a friend (not me of course) that had a strong feeling that he was going to be laid off about two months ago. At this time I told him, "Well it sounds like it is time for you to update your resume and send it out." His response was that he had been working for this company for 20 years and was going to just hang tight to see where it goes since the last time they did lay-offs they kept him. (DEEP SIGH) I say "Okay, but you are aware that you can do both, right?"

Fast forward 2 months later, he finds out that they are laying him off. Okay before I tell you more details, lay-offs happen I understand, but this, what I am about explain, I don't.

First, your supervisor says I think we might lay you off next week Friday. Keyword = Think. That is rather unprofessional and inappropriate.

Second, on Monday the owner of the company pulls you in the hallway to ask you if you heard about the finances.

[Pause Why do I care? [Play]

He tells you the company isn't doing to well and he is Sorry

[Play]

That he has had to lay-off a few people including his daughter.

[Play]

Because she isn't producing.

[Pause] "Why do I care?" [Play]

And I want you to know that I kind of need you around this week to do some stuff but understand if you are unable to...

[Pause] This situation is getting way too manipulative for me... first you go for the pity card about how YOUR company isn't doing well that you had to let down your own child. (Who we know will be fine because a man who hires his daughter to run one of his office locations doesn't just stop doing for her in a time of need.) Then you try to hit me with the but I need you to stay I just don't know until when... I got get everything from you first. EXCUSE ME?[Play]

At this point I say: So did you ask him when is your official last day?

His response: No I did not but let me tell you the rest of the story.

He then proceeds to tell boss man that he will stay and hang around and he understands.

[Pause] Why would you say you understand? What do you understand? Did you leave out some information when telling me the story so I don't understand.[Play]

He says: Well, I didn't want to burn any bridges. And he said he was going rehire us in a month.

I say: Sigh. This is just too much. How is asking the man when he thinks your official last day is burning a bridge. Sigh. Seriously? Twenty years of dedicated hard work would be flushed down the drain if you asked this question? So I said, did you at least set-up a follow up meeting to discuss your exit?

Response: No

[Pause] Okay at this point, I am like why didn't you ask these questions? I am only 29 and you are 37. [Play]

I say: These thoughts didn't cross your mind?

His Response: Not really.

[Pause] That is when it all clicked me... this makes sense. This is why you were there for 20 years. (BIG turn off for me!)

We did the pity-me behavior Friday through Sunday... not talking to nobody... staying in the house. When are we going to get moving. So I said what did you spend the day doing then... debriefing?

He says: No. I was at Borders and Fye.

I said: You weren't updating your resume at work? Sense you were too said to do it on Saturday. Or maybe writing up a memo debriefing on your accounts so the exit could be less painful and more professional.

He says: Nah, I am going to wait until we are done debriefing, that could happen whenever they want, and then I am going to talk about paying me my vacation because I know I am not going to get a severance.

[Pause] Did they say you weren't getting severance? [Play]

Him: No.

Okay so why are you waiting until they have gotten all the information they need to continue business without you to negotiate whether they should pay you a severance and vacation pay? The minute they are debrief on your accounts, your position is officially redundant they have all they need and no need to negotiate. This is why homeboy approached you the way that he did on Monday because he knows that your supervisor already told you maybe getting laid off next week. He knew you knew, that is why he asked you about the finances. Your boss and him already talked about it and made that decision sonny. The only thing that is currently being assessed right now is status of your work and the action plan for your role. HELLO?!?!

SILENCE.

Hello?!? Everything you are telling me I already know.

I said, "Oh, I am sorry. The way you were telling me the story and how you planned on handling it doesn't lead me to believe you do. My bad. No offense. Just trying to make sure you don't allow people to take advantage of you."

SILENCE.

Hello?!?!?

He says: I have to just do what they tell me.

My thoughts: Well if that ain't some coon like behavior. WHAT?! You don't have to do a DAMN thing! (sigh) I digress because obviously I expect too much from folks, maybe I hang out with too many entitled folks and it is rubbing off on me or may I am plain ole delusional. (sigh)

He says: The owner says he doesn't know the details of the figures.

My thoughts: I said I digress. You are a fool if you believe that! And if this was true, then he shouldn't tell you he is laying you off and will maybe hire you in a month... it is inappropriate, one. And two, why would you want to work a company that is SO poorly ran?

I say NOT A DAMN THING... but good night I have to be in NYC in the morning.

Peace and much luv until next week.... I am onto the next one :)