Gotta Get Up

Hey everyone! If you know this song, then come on and sing along with me: I - don’t - want- to- go- to- work- today – I’d rather – stay home – and play – video games – I wanna chillllllllllllll. Bada dada dum. But I gotta get up.

Yeah that song has been on repeat in my mind for the past few weeks. Mainly because I literally can’t get up and get out of bed to go to work. And it’s not that hate my job. I prayed for a new job that would take me out of the hell that was my last job which was the blackface version of The Devil Wears Prada. Oh someday that story will get told.

Anyway. Back to my inability to get up. Out of bed. And onto a crowded train where I have to push people to get out of the door. And into my office where I sit in front of the computer and do mindless work and answer phones and talk to the public and realize that people need to turn off the radio (word up Dead Prez ) and the TV and the internets (but after you read this post) and do some research on their own, or at least read. And for the record Obama cannot pay off Clinton’s debt. Please tell your friends. And call Donnie Simpson and tell him to stop spreading that foolishness.

Anyway. Back to my inability to get up. And stay focused. I can’t figure out what it is. No, actually I can. I, like a majority of people hate to do work. In general. It doesn’t matter that it’s not hard work. It doesn’t matter that it pays well. It doesn’t matter that it will enhance my resume. I don’t want to work for someone else. I don’t want to be confined by walls, stuck in a building while it’s so daggone sunny outside. I don’t want to leave my house in the pouring rain to go to work! All I want to do is lay in bed. Or on the beach. Or sit in a café in Paris. Scratch that I don’t drink coffee. Or go shopping for shoes in Paris. And then look for purses in Milan. And then windsurf off the coast ofAustralia. And then travel to Seychelles. For what? I'm not sure. I don't know what's in Seychelles. Or hit up a bar in the middle of the afternoon. Well actually I could do that, but isn't it a little bit wrong to come back to work tipsy? I'm bringing three-martini lunches back! Yeah! That only worked if you sang it to the tune of the Jtims song...

I know what I’m saying is nothing new. One day while I'm on the train home from a long day of work, I would like to do what I've always dreamed of, stand up on my chair and yell, “WHAT ARE WE WORKING OUR LIVES AWAY FOR?!? SERIOUSLY PEOPLE! SERIOUSLY!” And while Amaretto has brought me down to earth and pointed out that security would quickly carry me away, I know that while they were doing so, even though some people might look at me like I was crazy, a whole lot more people would cheer me on. And then that would be the beginning of the fight, the revolution for European type six week vacations for all Americans! Yes we can! Change we can believe in!

Now I say all this and you might be thinking that I want to work for myself, that once I focus on my passion, I’ll be good. Nope. I don’t even want to do that. I don’t want to be a housewife. I don’t want to be a stay at home mom. I don’t want to start my own company and experience the joy of building it from the ground up and running it. I just want to sit on my ass all day long. Have you ever paid attention to the song from the Wizard of Oz when they arrive at the Emerald City? Probably not. Well they sing, “We get up at 12 and go to work at 1, take an hour lunch and then at 2 we’re done. Jolly good fun! Ha ha ha, ho, ho, ho and a couple of tra la las, that’s how we laugh the day away in the merry ole Land of Oz.” That is what I want, my own personal merry ole Land of Oz. As long as I can wear more than green.

I realize to do this I would have to be wealthy. Which means I would have to work. And even then there’s no guarantee that I’d be wealthy enough to just lay around all day. Yeah that’s such the major a flaw in my plan. Maybe I could marry well. Or hit the lottery. Or find out how many people’s wills I’m in. Ok I know that’s not right. But I just can’t wrap my brain around working for years and years and years. Whether it’s for myself or for someone else. Man, someone should have hipped me to the monotony that is adulthood. Oh well at least there’s a silver lining. IT’S FRIDAY!!!!

That’s my time y’all! Happy Rum Punch Friday!