open up a window

i've been toying with the idea of writing out a new year, new mint julep kinda post but didn't really know what to say since i was still taking stock of all that was 2007. this past year has been one of the most challenging for me, a close second to the mind bending highs and lows of 2003, the year i lost my best friend, graduated from college, gained two more amazing friends, and moved to a new city where i knew virtually no one to began law school. wheew. just thinking back on it gives me chills as i realize how far i've come.



2007. started out good enough. on january 1, i proclaimed that it would be the year of the open door along with every one else at my church during our new year's praisabration. i'd put pen to paper right their in the sanctuary, coming up with 6 "doors" i wanted and believed God would open for me. in 2007. very ambitious to say the least.



and there in lay the problem. i believed that it would all happen in that one year. and i set about a haphazard path at a frenetic pace in order to achieve all of them. at once. or at a minimum before the clock struck twelve on december 31, 2007.



throughout the year, i made some moves, questioned my beliefs, tested my endurance and thought through what was really important to me. this blog helped a lot with that.



as 2007 closed i realized that every door wouldn't swing open in one year. i was demanding so much of God in such a short time but what had i done? what had i contributed to the storehouse? maybe i didn't have the key to unlock any of the doors. shoot, maybe i didn't know the first thing about even finding where any of the doors were. and just because i said it, proclaimed it, didn't mean that God would do it according to my timing. cause who's really in charge? yeah. exactly!



i have begun to examine myself, require more of myself, and to prioritize the doors. this means diligently commiting myself to being ready for whatever, wherever, whenever God decides that I'm ready to walk through those doors.