The Young and Restless Impatiently Waiting As The World Turns

Here I am waiting.

Just waiting.

Anticipating a chance to run into you.

I sit here for hours.

I'd be content to just sit here and talk to you.

In my dreams you love me and me only.

The way you kiss me and hold me.

Love is what I search and search to find.

But until then I'll just dream for the meantime.

- Outside Your Door, Me'shell Ndegeocello

My homegirl who lives in Atlanta came to visit this weekend. She and I met while living in the same dorm during our freshman year of college and have been cool ever since. I had a ball reminiscing about old times and swapping stories about new ones with her. We stayed up 'til the wee hours of the morning sipping, smoking, eating, chilling, kicking it...

And male bashing.

Ouuuuuccccchhhhhh! Those words are painful to my eyes and ears! I am also ashamed for engaging in such behavior. It's so not my style. There are specific brothers [and sisters] who I may speak about in a not so nice manner depending on their individual stories. But I am not the kind of chick to sit around singing the woe-is-me-good-men-are-hard-to-find song. However, this weekend my homegirl and one of her male suitors got the best of me.

My homegirl, let's call her Mary, didn't come all the way to DC just to see me. The primary cause of her visit was to come see a friend of hers preach. Her friend, who we'll refer to as Joseph, was a guest speaker at church in my neck of the woods and Mary came to show her boo some support. Yes I called him her boo... A spade is a spade. You'll understand in a minute.

Joseph attended college in the same town as Mary and I; we met him during freshman year while attending a gym jam at his school. They dated for a bit during those undergrad years and went their separate ways after graduation, but have always kept in touch. Fast forward a lil' bit... Mary was engaged to be married but she and her fiance broke it off January of this year. The fiance was on some bullshit [we can explore some other time]; luckily Mary didn't marry the sucker before finding out he was not the one.

Joseph also lives in Georgia, but he's a couple of hours away from Atlanta. On many occasions recently, Mary has traveled to see ole' boy speak. Now she has mentioned him to me in conversation, but I didn't realize until this weekend that they were seeing each other. This past Saturday was Joseph's birthday and Mary told him she was coming to DC to celebrate with him. I think her plan was to spend one day with me and the next with him.

Mary and I spoke Saturday morning to confirm her travel info. I was going to scoop her from the airport that evening; we would chill and she was spending the night at my crib. I asked about the location of the church where Joseph was speaking at on Sunday and told her I didn't mind accompanying her there. I figured they'd probably spend the rest of the day together so we'd split at the church. Well she didn't know the name or location of the church but said she would contact Joseph to find out. By the time I picked her up from the airport, she still had not spoken to brotherman and he had not called. She told me she texted him upon her arrival but he had not responded.

Sunday morning, we still had not heard from Joseph. We decided to sleep in because we went to bed very late the night before. By the time we finished brunch ('round 3PM), still no word from her boo. I could see the anguish on her face and even I was questioning what the hell was wrong with this fool. The weather was beautiful and the sun was shining, so Mary and I partook of a pitcher full of margaritas as we people watched while sitting at a sidewalk cafe. A couple of hours and mild tequila haze later, Joseph still had not called her. I told Mary to call him but she refused. She felt like why should she call him when he knew that she arrived the night before. He also knew that she wanted to go see him preach and she was obviously not present at the worship services. Mary said "my man should be checking on me, not the other way around."

We kept it moving to another bar and had yet another round of margaritas. Around 7:30 PM, Joseph texts Mary asking her where is she. She asked me how should she reply. I said to tell him "ditto motherf**ker", but she didn't like my suggestion. We end up leaving a nice table overlooking the waterfront to drive across town to meet this negro and his friends at a cigar bar. Do you know what this man said when we asked him why in the hell we hadn't heard from him? He said he didn't receive Mary's text Saturday night. And then asked her why she never called.

Didn't I tell her to call the man?! Either he answers and you get the info necessary or he doesn't answer and you can blame him for not providing the necessary info. But what is your defense if you never dialed his number?

Mary felt like he should have called looking for her, especially when he knew she was flying in for the weekend. She said that his ex-girlfriend lives here in DC and she had a feeling he would try to see her and probably invited the ex to see him preach. Mary even went as far as to speculate that Joseph purposely withheld the location of the church because he didn't want Mary's presence to throw salt in his game. She said the men in the pulpit get more panties thrown at them than a rock star. In the next breath, she tells me that he swears he ain't sleeping with nobody else.

At the end of the day, was it even worth it? We had a couple of drinks and cigars with Joesph and his buddies and they went on their merry way. Of course he wanted Mary to come back to his hotel room but she was too pissed at that point, so she spent the second night back at my crib. She showed me the sexy lace nightie that she purchased for the weekend as she balled it up and stuffed it into the side pocket of her suitcase, disgusted with herself for expecting love and happiness. It was truly hard to watch this weekend's events unfold.

This morning, as we rode to the airport, Mary asked me if I were her what would I do. I wasn't sure how to answer. My initial reaction is to give Joseph the finger and keep it moving. I'm mad and we ain't even knockin boots! See, I've been the one waiting. Sometimes, waiting in vain. I wouldn't wish that feeling on anyone. Why should Mary wait either? Why do we wait on what can or what may be? Does the waiting ever pay off?

If you were Mary, what would you do?

Tumultuously Yours,

Dark & Stormy